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Honest Animals: Green, Gold and Fear

"Colourful commentary by cheeky characters"

A new illustrated blog series created

DISCLAIMER: a sense of humour is required :)

Hello, my name is Robert the Racoon. I am an in investor with the Royal Bank of Canada. I have been working crazy hours to get my vault filled with bitcoins. Buy low and sell high is my motto. Heck I was even involved with FINTRAC, Canada's financial intelligence unit. Its mandate is to facilitate the detection, prevention and deterrence of money laundering and the financing of terrorist activities like the Freedom Convoy in Ottawa in February 2022. Man, I tell opponents call me a criminal, but I just do what Justin Mallard tells me to do like freeze the bank accounts of thousands of hard-working people.

Hello everyone reading this. Dawson is my name and as you can see, I am a mountain goat from the Yukon territories. I must say my favourite thing is gold!! Yes gold! My family and I got into the gold business a few years ago and we haven't looked back. I do my exploration in the high mountains to find new gold veins for the company. We heard a rumour that petroleum industry was going to be forced into closure because of the green new deal. You don’t need green to survive. All you need is Gold!!! GOLD!!!

Hello, how are you doing today? My name is Adam, and I am from Newfoundland by’e. In 2015 I voted for the first time, and I voted for Justin Mallard because he promised to legalize weed. I have been high since 2017, when weed was legalized in Canada. I am a digital web developer and only leave the house for the green stuff and I’m not talking about the queenies. I get my food delivered to my house and I spend most of my time inside either on the computer or playing Xbox. Most of my assets are in the digital currency market from bitcoin to efurrium. The only thing that ticked me off during the pandy was people not listening to the science. You have to follow the science that Justin Mallard tells you to follow! The man who gave us marijuana wouldn't lie to us would he?

Hello, my name is Jonny. Have you ever heard of Elafiphobia? It is a fear of deer. I have been roaming around Western Canada for what feels like eons. I feel the people of East all have Elafiphobia of mule deer. They only seem to like the white-tailed deer in the eastern provinces. It makes me wonder what they don't like about us mule deer. Is it because we have black tails and big ears? Anyways people have fears, some fear ticks aka arachnophobia. Some people’s fears were made worse during the pandemic. Pathopobia fear of diseases; cyberphobia fear of computers; Noscophobia fear of hospitals; Trypanophobia fear of needles and injections; Mysophobia fear of germs. These were fears I noticed everywhere around me. During the lockdowns there were two main Phobias I noticed: Autophobia which is the fear of being alone; and the major one was Claustrophobia (and I don't mean the fear of Klaus Schwab) the fear of confined spaces. The lockdowns created a prison like environment for people in the cities but for us people in the country we had room to roam.


James and I just want to thank you for all your love and support and we hope we can continue to grow and share our work with you, our wonderful audience.


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